I have been shopping for an Assisted Living home for my Mother. I've been to some up near where she lives, and to others closer to my home. How do I get her to move? How can I get her to cooperate? How can I change her mind-set from "drag my dead body out of here" to "this would be a good thing"?
How can I make her understand that this is not like the horrid nursing home where her brother-in-law had to live.
They are not like the cancer wards of 60 years ago, where her mother died a slow painful death.
How can I make her understand that these are not jails?
They are not like the TB asylum of the 1950's where her little brother had to live for a year, leashed to a bed.
I'm sure all these images are running through her mind when she thinks of moving to a "home".
How can I make her understand that she'll have her own apartment, her own bathroom. All of the apartments I've seen are nicer than any I've ever had.
She'll get three meals a day cooked for her, and someone else will wash the dishes!
There will be people to socialize with, new friends to make, activities to attend, gardens to tend, bird feeders to fill. Some places would even let her bring her cat. She'll have a microwave and a fridge, where she can keep snacks and drinks.
Once again, I am overwhelmed by the emotion of it all. To see my mother in an Assisted Living setting, I can picture her two ways: one is sitting on her bed, clutching her purse and mumbling to herself over and over "I want to go home", and the other way is that she is the one leading the group sing-a-long or giving a talk on the history of Mt M__.