I finally have one. I have a Parking Permit for the Walking Disabled, aka a handicapped parking hang-tag for my car. Now when Mom and I go for a ride, I can park closer.
To get this hang-tag, the department of motor vehicles needed the signed application from me, a signed form from her doctor, and a copy of my durable power of attorney.
So... all this paperwork for a tiny blue parking permit got me thinking.
When I sold Mom's house, no one asked to see my durable power of attorney. No one ever asked if I was authorized to sell this house. Yes, they asked to see my identification, I am who I am. And, yes, I am my Mother's daughter. And, yes, I have a key to this house. BUT am I the person who my Mother has authorized to "acquire, dispose of and sell real property?"
The people who did the closing wanted to see my father's death certificate, to make sure he no longer had any claim to this property. They are the same people who handed me that big check, and never asked me if I had authority to take it. (tisk, tisk, tisk)
I have heard of many families, who have parents with dementia, who are fighting about authority, power, control, and money. Fortunately we're not one of them. My Mother gave me a job to do, and my brother trusts me to do it.