Friday, December 21, 2012


I keep procrastinating. I know she is not going to like it. I know it will make her angry. I know it will make her sad.

I have to get the ring cut off her finger. The ring has scarred her flesh. It is way too tight. This is the same ring she lost two years ago, when her fingers had become so thin from not eating.  Now her body is swollen and her fingers are too.

Two months ago I managed to massage the other ring off her hand with a lot of hand-cream and tugging. I told her I was taking it, I told her I would keep it safe. I told her it was cutting into her skin. I told the aides, I wrote it in her guest book. However the next time I saw her she was crying and saying "lost... Grammy's... lost..."  Trying to communicate to me that she had lost her mother's ring. Once again I tried to reassure her that I had it and it was safe. But it didn't matter what I said, when she looked at her hand, it was not there.

Over and over, day after day, she will look at her hand and see that her ring is missing. It will make her very sad.

This ring won't budge, It has to be cut off.


Michele Bilyeu said...

I am always so touched by your words, here. I have been, and continue to be, in so many of the same places. Know that my thoughts and prayers are always with you and with your loved ones. We walk such a challenging journey..but we walk it always, with others by our side. My heart is always with you and with your mother, as well.

Debbie's Garden said...

Can you replace it with some other ring that does fit? Do you think if she has any ring on she might not notice its not Grammy's?