Wednesday, December 18, 2013

did you get the message?

When I got to Mom's today she was just sitting down for dinner.  She saw me from across the room, smiled, and waved.
"My, my daughter!" she boomed.
Wow, it's a great feeling to be recognized, she made my day.
I wave back across the room. "Hi, Mom, it's so good to see you."

Before her meal comes we look at the pile of Christmas cards that she's received. She doesn't open her mail anymore. We oooh and aaah at the cute pictures on the cards. "Slow down" she manages to say. She wants to look at the picture more carefully.  She's alert today and engaged in her surroundings.  She doesn't acknowledge all the names I read to her, but some names get a "yes yes" response.

Then lunch is served and another lady at the table starts talking to me. "Is this your mother?" she asks.
"Yes I'm her daughter."
"You are so lucky to still have your mother."
Oh my, my heart is stuck in my throat. Take a big breath and try not to cry.
I smile back at her "Yes I am."
"My mother is dead, and my father too. But you're not as old as me. Is you mother a teacher?"
"Yes, Mom was a second grade teacher.  Are you a teacher?"
"Yes, I taught kindergarten. Is this your mother?"
"Yes she is."
"You are so lucky to still have your mother."
"Thank you, I am lucky."
"My mother's dead. Is your mother a teacher? I was a teacher."
"Yes Mom taught second grade. Are you enjoying your lunch?"
"It's alright, is that your mother?"
"Yes this is my mother."
"You are so lucky to still have your mother."
"Yes I am." 

Oh no! We are stuck in a conversational loop.  But maybe this loop is carrying the message that I needed to hear today.  Maybe today's messenger is a sweet demented little old lady.

I am so lucky to still have my mother.

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